Last night's game was a real kick in the junk. I mean, the whole season has been pretty lousy, but losing 8-0 to the 13th ranked team (12th ranked after last night) in the conference is flat-out sickening; like watching your sister in an 8-guy cream pie porno. Get it? 1 cream pie for every goal. Meuh!
Fuck!
Boys, boys, boys. What is there to say after that one? It was an absolutely disgusting affair. Richard fucking Zednik - a guy who went over 20 games without a goal this year - got a hat trick. Shit! Brett fucking McLean - a guy whose previous single game point total was two - got five points. He only had 11 points all season before last night's game. Cock! The Panthers are coached by Jacques Martin, one of the most defensive-minded coaches in the history of the world, yet they managed 8 goals in one game. Cunt! The Panthers' previous high this season was 6 goals, and they did that only once. Piss!
Despite my childish cursing, there is almost no bad news to be taken from the game last night. I mean, unless you were at the ACC for the game (sucker!). We know the 2007/08 Toronto Maple Leafs are pretty effing bad. There were, however, a few typical Leafs fans that were still holding onto playoff aspirations, but even those fans should now be convinced that rebuilding is the only reasonable course of action. Last night's game effectively gave Cliff Fletcher the green light to do something dramatic if he feels the need. Nobody is going to question a significant move anymore, as a big move only means that less of this vagina of a team will remain.
Last night's game also gave management a good look at a few of the Marlies' standouts. The results are in, and they ain't promising. Kris Newbury and Ben Ondrus proved once again that they are not NHL talents. They hustle, sure, but NHL-calibre players need to bring more than that. They both tried to show their worth via a fight, and they even failed at that. Some hockey players really need to learn the difference between a willingness to drop the mitts, and the ability to fight. Darcy Tucker: I am talking to you here as well.
The sole standout from the AHL squad was Robbie Earl. There is a man that hustles and skates like Jason Blake, but also brings with that soft hands, and a willingness to take the puck to the net. Robbie Earl will be on the 2008/09 Leafs squad. Take it to the bank. Joining him will be current Leafs Anton Stralman and Jiri Tlusty, both of whom began this season with the Marlies.
The Leafs goaltending was stellar last night: 8 goals on 26 shots. A combined 0.692 save percentage. Andrew Raycroft was brought in after a sloppy start by Vesa Toskala, only to play worse than Vesku. But really, that shouldn't have been a surprise to anyone. Raycroft is an ECHL talent. His apathy after terrible goals allowed is more frustrating than a Jehovah's Witness at your door. Andy, if you showed a little personality out there, I don't think you'd be the most hated man in the city. Maybe you should give it a shot.
If this Leafs team fell into a barrel of tits, it'd come out sucking its own thumb. Please, Fletch, bring in some real men that'll go for the tits!
Fuck!
Boys, boys, boys. What is there to say after that one? It was an absolutely disgusting affair. Richard fucking Zednik - a guy who went over 20 games without a goal this year - got a hat trick. Shit! Brett fucking McLean - a guy whose previous single game point total was two - got five points. He only had 11 points all season before last night's game. Cock! The Panthers are coached by Jacques Martin, one of the most defensive-minded coaches in the history of the world, yet they managed 8 goals in one game. Cunt! The Panthers' previous high this season was 6 goals, and they did that only once. Piss!
Despite my childish cursing, there is almost no bad news to be taken from the game last night. I mean, unless you were at the ACC for the game (sucker!). We know the 2007/08 Toronto Maple Leafs are pretty effing bad. There were, however, a few typical Leafs fans that were still holding onto playoff aspirations, but even those fans should now be convinced that rebuilding is the only reasonable course of action. Last night's game effectively gave Cliff Fletcher the green light to do something dramatic if he feels the need. Nobody is going to question a significant move anymore, as a big move only means that less of this vagina of a team will remain.
Last night's game also gave management a good look at a few of the Marlies' standouts. The results are in, and they ain't promising. Kris Newbury and Ben Ondrus proved once again that they are not NHL talents. They hustle, sure, but NHL-calibre players need to bring more than that. They both tried to show their worth via a fight, and they even failed at that. Some hockey players really need to learn the difference between a willingness to drop the mitts, and the ability to fight. Darcy Tucker: I am talking to you here as well.
The sole standout from the AHL squad was Robbie Earl. There is a man that hustles and skates like Jason Blake, but also brings with that soft hands, and a willingness to take the puck to the net. Robbie Earl will be on the 2008/09 Leafs squad. Take it to the bank. Joining him will be current Leafs Anton Stralman and Jiri Tlusty, both of whom began this season with the Marlies.
The Leafs goaltending was stellar last night: 8 goals on 26 shots. A combined 0.692 save percentage. Andrew Raycroft was brought in after a sloppy start by Vesa Toskala, only to play worse than Vesku. But really, that shouldn't have been a surprise to anyone. Raycroft is an ECHL talent. His apathy after terrible goals allowed is more frustrating than a Jehovah's Witness at your door. Andy, if you showed a little personality out there, I don't think you'd be the most hated man in the city. Maybe you should give it a shot.
If this Leafs team fell into a barrel of tits, it'd come out sucking its own thumb. Please, Fletch, bring in some real men that'll go for the tits!
Powered by ScribeFire.
4 comments:
Great post, real funny the whole way through. Lousy Leaf game though, maybe this will give Fletcher the green light to start making moves.
Just think it needs to be mentioned how Matt Stajan made a very poor attempt at trying to fight in last nights game.
He picked a guy who isn't very big, and who wears a visor like himself. The thing is, Stay-At-Home-Stajan has never been in a fight, and his punches are probably just about as hard as his hits, vegetarian.
I was laughing when I saw him drop the gloves with Ruslan Salei, and even laughing harder when Salei's first soft punch knocked off Stajan's helmet exposing his 24 year old balding scalp. Salei was so generous in this fight not to even throw one decent punch, and Stajan got out of the fight quickly by falling over on Salei's next softy.
The officials crowded around Stajan on the ground with Salei holding on to him, who helped him up, and even gave Stajan a pat on the shoulder at the end.
A couple tips for Stajan: do some strength training and stop being such a little girl when you play,keep the gloves on, and shave the hair. It's brutal.
Apparently Stajan can dead lift a ton...you'd never know if by the way he plays tho.
I think he took the 'you must get stronger' advice to heart, but forgot its real meaning: 'you must get stronger so as to be tougher to play against'.
I've never seen such a pathetic game from a team claiming to be still in the hunt. How does this collection of losers all manage to go into mental meltdown at the same time? Is it coaching? Is it a country club mentality?
Interesting thought, AMWadmin (and thanks for your contribution).
My post alluded to the fact that some fans out there still believe this team to be 'in the hunt', but since I posted it I've gotten a better sense of just how many fans fit that description. There is this gigantic ever-optimistic faction that refuses to say die. The Leafs have shown very little in the way of a competitive spirit this year, and coupled with an obvious lack of talent, it is a recipe for disaster. These are the fans that MLSE has toyed with, as they'll always support the team - and honestly think the team can win big - despite all logic that says otherwise.
My optimism about the team stems from admitting how terrible they have been, but hoping that Fletch is able to work a little magic so as to give hope for the future. I think there are pieces on this team that, if traded, could bring some decent value in return. Of course, these are generally the same players with no-trade clauses (fucking JFJ), so Fletch will have to be on his "A" game.
As for coaching, I feel that Paul Maurice won't be back next year. A new GM will likely bring in his own coach, because Maurice - although I do believe him to be a good coach - has done fuck all with this team. Obviously, there isn't much on this team with which to work, but such is life in the NHL. Win or be replaced, and Maurice hasn't won a thing.
Post a Comment